You need both Sunshine and Rain to make a Rainbow. :)

Written on 6/27/13 (Forgot to Publish)

I'm sitting here reflecting on my life and I have to say that overall I am very happy. :) I feel very fortunate to have so many wonderful friends and family members who are there for me.  I have to remember this when I am disappointed by those who I reach out to who do not respond.  The positives far outweigh the negatives.

I look at my life now and I am happy with so many things despite my living arrangement with my mom and her condition.  It makes me sad sometimes to see how she has declined and how she doesn't remember things that used to make us laugh.  I remember talking about Alzheimer's when I was younger and discussing how it would be the worst thing to have.  I hate the fact that I am constantly annoyed or agitated with her.  I think I just miss the relationship we used to have and how independent she always was.  I'm sure she misses it too and I should be more understanding.  The roles have reversed and I've lost the mom I used to have and haven't completely adapted to this new version of her. I need to create more routines, which is really difficult for me but I really think it would help.  I got a little off topic there. Sorry. 

I meant to start off with the things I am "happy" about and I started with one of my "difficulties" instead.  I will say that my mom is easier to live with now than a year ago so that's good. :)  I have been doing lots of house projects including planting flowers and covering the ground with weed block and mulch out front on the hill.  I have been wanting to do that for years! Now I won't have to mow the hill. :)  I should also mention that my friend Kim helped me immensely with this project.  She helped pick out all of the plants and guided me in exactly what I needed to do and was there by my side helping me the entire time.  I am truly thankful to have met Kim and her husband John. :)  I met Kim when I dated her cousin that was staying with her.  He turned out to be not such a great guy but Kim turned out to be a great friend that I feel like I've known for years. :)  Everything happens for a reason.